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Dear Abby: After decades of fun and memories, woman abruptly ghosts all of her long-time friends

DEAR ABBY: I have had a friend who has been in my life and part of my group of friends’ lives since high school. Years and years later, she has become increasingly negative toward all of us for no reason. Her husband is dying now, and we don’t know how to handle it.
She has ghosted all of us because she’s so full of hatred and negativity. We had decades of fun and memories, but she wants nothing to do with us. How do we handle the death of her husband? She says we are all phonies, which is all in her head. — PERPLEXED IN OHIO
DEAR PERPLEXED: How long has this woman been becoming “negative”? There may be a reason why she has changed. Her husband is sick and he’s not going to get better. If she loves him and feels any responsibility to him at all, she’s directing all of her energies in that direction.
The way to handle this would be for you longtime friends to step forward. Tell her you care. Volunteer to help in any way she will allow, and do not isolate her any more than she has isolated herself. If you haven’t done that, I can see why she might have said she thought you were phonies.
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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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